


I'll Take Care Of You

by AmandaCanzo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-12
Updated: 2013-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-11 14:26:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/799734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmandaCanzo/pseuds/AmandaCanzo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Castiel meet when they're children, instantly becoming best friends. Dean and Sam live a good life with their single mom but when Dean's world falls apart around him, it's Castiel who takes care of him and builds him back up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

October 30th, 1983

Some might call it a chore, but Mary Winchester loves Sunday morning food shopping with her two little boys. Sam gurgles happily in his car seat, playing with his feet as Mary pushes the cart through the supermarket. Dean is sitting in the cart, staring, as he always does, at everything. Mary smiles; she loves watching Dean take everything in. Everything is new to him, even if he’s seen it more than once. 

“What kind of candy should we get, Dean?” she asks, stopping in the aisle with the Halloween candy. Dean is glancing around at everything, his head swivelling rapidly as he cranes his neck. Then something seems to capture his attention. 

With wide eyes Dean turns back towards his mom. “Mommy, can boys be pretty?” he asks, already turning his head back towards whomever he saw. Mary looks in the same direction and smiles slightly. A little boy wrapped up in a tan blanket is sitting in the front of another shopping cart, and even from here, Mary can see his bright blue eyes taking everything around him in with a rare kind of joy for a kid so young. Mary can see him continually staring in the direction of his mom. 

“Of course boys can be pretty, Dean,” she tells her son softly, making a mental note to remember this moment if ever a teenage Dean comes to tell her that he likes boys. “Anyone can be pretty, sweetheart,” she adds, grabbing a couple of bags of candy. 

Dean nods, still staring at the other boy. “He’s the prettiest person I’ve ever seen,” he mumbles. Mary chuckles, pushing their cart towards the other boy. She doesn't recognize him and she can’t help but wonder if the family is new in town. Lawrence is small and she's familiar with almost everyone. She stops their cart right next to the boy and Dean stares at him, wide-eyed and slack-jawed in wonder.

“Hi! I’m Dean. You’re really pretty – what’s your name? Where do you live? We should play together! Can we be friends?” Dean rambles, each sentence flowing into the next without pause, and Mary can't help but feel somewhat sorry for the other boy. 

“I’m Castiel,” the other boy says softly. Mary waits for him to answer the other questions, but he stays silent, looking in the direction of his mother. Castiel’s mother looks up, sees them, and walks over. 

“Hello, I’m Anna,” she says, extending her hand. Mary shakes it politely.

“I'm Mary,” Mary responds, smiling good-naturedly.

“You’ll have to forgive my son, he’s very shy,” Anna says, rubbing a hand across Castiel’s back with a tired and sympathetic expression that implies this happens all the time.

“I’m gonna call you Cas, and you’ll be my best friend,” Dean says confidently, beaming with pride. Cas looks at Dean again, eyes wide and round, before slowly nodding. Dean looks back at Mary with his childish grin, making her chuckle. She exchanges numbers with Anna and sets up a playdate for her son and his “pretty” new friend. Dean pouts as Mary begins to steer the cart away from Cas and his mother.

Dean spends the rest of the shopping trip looking for his new friend, poking his head around corners and keeping his eyes wide. Silences that would’ve been spent with Dean eyeing the shelves are instead filled with the young boy chattering on about Cas this or Cas that. Dean becomes visibly disappointed when they leave without having spotted the quiet boy again. 

Once they’re home, Dean begs Mary nonstop to call Anna and ask if Cas would like to go trick-or-treating with them the following night. Sam is too young and too easily tired to be of any amusement to Dean, and it’s good for Dean to have some company his own age. Mary makes him wait until after they have eaten dinner before she calls, trying to emphasize the virtue of patience. 

“Are you gonna call _now_?” Dean whines the moment he's finished his food, clutching at Mary’s leg, and looking up at her with wide eyes. She shakes her head, chuckling.

“Yes, Dean. I’m calling her now, just as I promised you I would,” she says with a smile. Dean manages to make impatience look adorable somehow, bouncing up and down and tapping his hands against his sides. The phone’s barely rung before Anna picks up. 

“Hello Anna,” Mary says once Anna responds. “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything?”

“No not at all!” Anna says, a smile evident in her voice. “In fact, surprisingly enough, Castiel has been asking about Dean since we got home. He doesn’t know many people here. Neither of us do, really,” she says, laughing softly. 

“Yeah, it’s probably hard moving to a new town,” Mary says softly. “But anyways hopefully you aren’t busy tomorrow?”

“Nope!” Anna says cheerily. 

Mary beams, and gives Dean a wink. His eyes widen and Mary thinks he might actually be holding his breath. 

“Oh good! Dean wants to know if you two would like to join us for trick-or-treating tomorrow,” Mary asks, trying to stop Dean from tugging her pants down in his excitement. 

“We would love to,” Anna replies instantly. “We’ll meet you tomorrow at the park?” Mary can faintly hear Castiel in the background of the phone call. She can't make out what he's saying – his voice is far too soft for that – but it sounds positive.

“Perfect. See you two tomorrow!” They exchange goodbyes and Mary hangs up. She stares down at her son, whose eyes are still wide and hopeful.

“They said yes,” she tells him, laughing as Dean lets go of her and runs around the kitchen, cheering as he goes. 

*

Dean gets himself dressed in his costume early on Halloween morning and spends most of it running around the house, putting out pretend fires. He's been on a fireman kick ever since he learned what a firefighter is, and there was no question what his costume would be this year. Every five minutes, he asks Mary if they can go. Mary laughs; seeing her son this happy is a wonderful thing, and Mary knows she will take great pleasure in one day teasing Dean about this when he’s older.

After what feels like an eternity for Dean, they head out to go meet Cas and Anna. Dean walks beside Mary, clutching her hand as she pushes Sam in his stroller. The moment Dean sees Cas across the park he lets go of Mary’s hand and races to the other boy's side, grinning the whole way. Castiel is dressed in all white and has a pair of wings attached to his back, along with a silver halo suspended from a headband above his head. Mary greets Anna with a smile, watching the boys interact.

“You make a really pretty angel,” Dean tells Cas, reaching out to touch the wings of Cas’ costume. “I bet you would be a really good _real_ angel,” he adds with a small smile.

“I am an angel. I am the angel of Thursdays. That is what my name means,” Cas tells Dean with a tilt of his head. “Your costume is nice as well.” Dean grins, bouncing on his heels before turning towards the two mothers.

“Is it time? Can we start?” he asks jumping slightly, stopping and looking up at Mary with wide eyes when Cas puts a hand on his shoulder.

“Yes, I believe it is time for us to start trick-or-treating,” Mary says with a small smile. She goes to grab Dean’s hand but he shakes his head reaching down to grab Cas’ hand with a grin. They begin walking to the first house and Cas' grip tightens on Dean's hand.

"What's wrong?" Dean whispers to Cas. Cas shakes his head staring at the house in front of them. Dean tilts his head - in his mind, the house isn't too scary looking but Cas seems to be frightened out of his mind. 

"I don't like clowns," he mumbles staring at the scarecrow that stands silently in the front garden, watching over the two of them in the bright clothes of a clown. Dean nods, tightening his grip on Cas' hand.

"Don't worry, I'll protect you from the clowns." Dean says proudly. Cas turns to him, giving him a small smile. Mary glances back at the two of them with a grin, happy for Dean to have made a friend. 

“Thank you Dean,” Cas says softly as they walk past the house. Dean tightens his grip on Cas’ hand anytime he sees a clown, a gesture that Cas is thankful for. Eventually both boys are dragging their feet, hardly walking and leaning against each other for support. Anna and Mary smile at their two boys, exchanging a look as they each picked one up. 

“No,” Dean whines, still gripping Cas’ hand. Mary laughs softly.

“It’s time to go home, Dean. You can see Cas in the morning,” Mary says softly, rubbing at Dean’s back as the young boy begins to fall asleep. Anna and Mary exchange goodbyes promising to meet up the next day.


	2. Chapter Two

_Fire. Pain. Heat. Screaming. Sammy’s crying. Where’s mom? Smoke. I can’t breathe. Crying. Is that me crying? Running, air....I’m flying._

Dean wakes up screaming. His breath comes out in hard pants as he attempts to calm down. He sits up, eyes searching the room, sighing in relief when he notices no one else has woken up. He rubs at his eyes as the images in his dream fade from his mind. He jumps slightly when he feels his bed dip. 

“Dean,” comes the soft voice of his four year old brother as he climbs onto the bed and into Dean’s lap. His hazel eyes stare up at him, his gaze questioning. 

“Hey Sammy, why are you awake?” Dean asks, wrapping an arm around his little brother.

“You were screaming,” Sam mumbles, his eyes already falling shut again. Dean smiles slightly, laying down with Sam on his chest. Dean stares up at the ceiling as he feels and hears his brother fall asleep. He misses home, the comfort of his mom’s hug. Mostly he misses having a place he could call home, and not just a bed in an orphanage. Dean isn’t stupid, he knows he’s known as somewhat of a problem child. It’s not his fault Sammy is small and the other boys pick on him constantly. As his big brother it’s Dean’s duty to take care of him. It just tends to get him in trouble more often than not. He’s nearly been adopted a couple times only for it to fall through when Sam refused to leave Dean behind. Dean wishes Sam wouldn't do that so he could get adopted. As much as it would suck to be separated from Sam, Dean would rather Sam be safe. Eventually Dean falls back asleep. 

_Bright blue eyes. A hand clasped tight in his. Sobbing...why was he sobbing? He could still feel the flames. Still hear the fire crackle. Whispers in his ear. Where was Sammy? A hand on his back. A promise whispered against his neck. A promise that couldn’t be kept. Would never be kept. Screaming, crying...not his...but whose? Cas. Castiel, normally calm and put together yelling at his mother. Yelling at her to adopt us. Sad brown eyes with a shake of her head they were taken away. Away from home. Away from Cas._

This time when Dean awakes, he’s crying. This has become normal for him. He cries anytime he dreams of the mysterious boy from his hometown. Once Dean has fully woken up, he realizes Sam is staring at him. 

“What?” he asks defensively. He sighs when Sam throws his whole body onto him, hugging him tight.

“Don’t cry, Dean, I have a good feeling about today. We’ll be adopted today, you’ll see.” Dean tries to smile, unable to bring himself to tell Sam the truth. Dean will try his hardest to get Sam adopted today. Sam needs to be safe and out of this orphanage. 

“Sam, Dean, you have a visitor!” Ruby, the caretaker at the orphanage calls out. Sam grins up at Dean, hopping off the bed.

“See! I told you Dean! Today is a good day!” He runs over to his own bed quickly dressing in his day clothes. “Dean! Come on, we have a visitor! They will surely adopt us! I can just feel it!” Dean just watches as Sam runs around, clearly confident and excited about their potential adoption. Dean moves much slower than Sam. He’s not stupid he knows realistically he won’t be adopted. Sam will, Dean will make sure of it. 

“Alright, Sammy, let’s go see who it is,” Dean says with a small sigh. Sam grabs Dean’s hand pulling him out of the room. Ruby points them in the direction of an older man with eyes that nearly seemed yellow. Dean gets chills just looking at him. Sam clearly doesn’t get the same eerie feeling about him as Dean does since he runs right over to the man.

“Hello, you must be Sam and Dean. I’m Azazel,” he greets them with a crooked grin. Dean bites his lip to keep from frowning. What kind of name is Azazel? Dean stays a good fifteen feet away from the man. He wonders why Sam doesn’t feel the same sort of evil vibe coming from the man. 

“I’m Sam!” Sam says excitedly, waiting for Dean to introduce himself. When he doesn’t Sam sighs dramatically. “And that’s my big brother, Dean. Are you going to adopt us?” he asks bluntly. The man laughs, finding Sam’s bluntless funny or cute, Dean isn’t sure which one. 

“I’m thinking about it. Would you guys like that?” he asks with another smirk. Sam nods quickly but Dean remains still. As much as he yearns for Sam to be out of this place, he’s not exactly sure going with Azazel would be any better. Although, logically Dean knows he doesn’t have a choice. If Azazel chooses to adopt them, that was it. When Sam notices that Dean still hasn’t answered, he glares pointedly at his brother. Dean sighs before nodding. Azazel grins. “Perfect. I’ve always wanted sons,” he said standing up from the chair. “We’ll do the paperwork now.” Sam turns to Dean and grins widely. “Why don’t you two go pack your stuff and come back here and we can go to your new home.”

“Okay, Mr. Azazel!” Sam says, grabbing Dean’s hand and dragging him into where their beds were. Dean’s stomach churns uneasily as he packs up the little belongings he has. Nothing feels right about this adoption, but Dean knows he can’t argue. He hopes that it will be better than where they were now. Sam is bouncing as he waits for Dean and it makes him smile sadly. His memory of before isn’t always the greatest but he still remembers being excited about Halloween, and bouncing and Cas’ hand. He remembers when he still actually got excited about things. “Come on Dean! I told you we would get adopted today, I just knew it!” Dean wishes Sam hadn’t been right.

The whole process goes rather fast, making Dean suspicious, but there isn’t much an eight year old kid can do. He wants to say something, but the joy in Sam’s eyes makes him stop. He has to make Sam happy, it’s his duty. Sam is his duty.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is from Cas' side of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Descriptions of child abuse

_Bright green eyes clench close as the hand hits his head. He bites his lip holding back the whimper as his head smacks the table and his nose begins to bleed. He doesn’t understand what he did to deserve this. He’s been good and quiet and not weird at all. Why is this happening?_

Cas wakes up, his nose aching. He presses his hand against it, shocked when blood isn’t on his hand. The dream or whatever it was felt so real. He closes his eyes, remembering the green eyes. His eyes were blue. Cas’ eyes pop open. Dean. Dean’s eyes were green. A brilliant green that even at four years old Cas appreciated and remembered. Cas rubbed at his eyes. He didn’t understand why he’s been having so many dreams of someone he hadn’t seen in four years lately. He sighs, curling around his tan blanket looking around his room before popping his thumb in his mouth. His mom tells him everyday that it’s an incredibly bad habit but it comforts him when he needs it so Cas really doesn’t see what’s so horrible about it. 

He wakes up again to his mom hitting him on the head with a pillow. “Castiel! Stop that, I told you it’s a bad habit,” Anna scolds, pulling back the blankets. “Come on, get up or you’ll be late for school,” she adds, going to open his blinds. There’s a loud bang from down the hallway. “Oh for...” Anna mutters, walking out of the room to go see what Cas’ little brother is doing. Cas slinks out of the bed to get ready. He dreads school, he wishes his mom wouldn’t make him go. The kids are mean and pick on him. Anna walks back into the room just in time to see a bruise on Cas’ side. “Castiel!” she cries concerned, rushing to him. “Where did you get that?” Cas looks down shrugging. 

“I dunno,” he mumbles. His mom would never believe him if he said he had awoke from a dream with his side humming with pain. 

Anna puts a comforting hand on his shoulder, “Cas are you being bullied? You know you can tell me if you are,” she says softly. Cas looks down biting his lip. He doesn’t want to lie to his mom, but it’s not a complete lie. Surely those are okay, and not a punishable offense. So he nods. “Okay sweetie, you’re not going to school today, okay? I’ll find you a new one, one that won’t allow bullying,” Anna says rubbing Cas’ back with a worried frown. She had been afraid of this, with Castiel being so different from most eight year olds, she had worried he would be bullied and teased. In fact, Anna had been so afraid of it that she had been saving up for a private school since Cas was one. Another crash comes from down the hall, and Anna rolls her eyes. “Come on Cas, let’s go get your brother,” she says, taking Cas’ hand and leading him to Gabriel’s room. 

“CAS!” Gabriel cries the second Cas walks in the door, his chubby short legs awkwardly carry him across the room as he runs to his older brother, wrapping a chocolate covered hand around Cas’ hand. 

“Gabe, where in the world did you get chocolate?” Anna mutters, searching Gabriel’s room for hidden candy. Cas pulls his hand away, grimacing at the mess Gabe has left. 

“Come on Gabe, let’s get you cleaned up,” Cas says, taking Gabriel’s hand- the one not covered in chocolate- and taking him to the bathroom to clean up. “You know you shouldn’t eat all that candy. It’s bad for you, Gabe,” Cas tells his little brother as he washes his hands. 

“Candy good!” Gabe yells out with a large smile. Once his hands are cleaned he wraps them around Cas. “Cas! Cas! Play with me!” Gabe demands. Cas grins, picking up his brother and going down into their playroom. Gabriel goes straight to the toy chest plucking out a couple of dolls and throwing them to the floor. Then he reaches inside again, grabbing out two pieces of candy. 

“No, Gabe,” Cas says grabbing the candy from him and the hiding spot. “You gotta stop hiding candy from mom,” Cas mutters turning to go upstairs when Gabriel latches onto his leg. 

“ _No! Cas! Don’t take away my candy!_ ” Gabe cries, looking up at his brother with tear-stained cheeks. “Please Cas!” Gabe pouts, wiping his face on Cas’ pants. Cas sighs handing back the candy. 

“Don’t tell mom,” Cas mutters, prying Gabriel from his leg. “Be good,” he adds rushing up the stairs to change his pants. If it’s one thing Cas hates more than anything, it’s germs and messes. Unfortunately for him, Gabriel was his little brother which meant tons of messes and germs. Cas despised it, he didn’t know how Gabriel could live with such...filth. Cas got up on his bed, laying down. He intended to go back down to play with Gabe, but as he laid down he felt his eyes get heavy as he fell asleep. 

_Anger. Pain. Yelling. Green eyes filled with pain. Cas reaches out, grips a hand...Dean’s hand. Cas wants to talk, wants to tell Dean it will be okay, but he can’t get his mouth to work. Dean cries out in pain as an older man kicks him to the ground pulling apart their hands. He tries again to cry out, to do anything to help Dean. “DEAN! DEAN!” he’s sobbing now reaching for his friend. “DEAN!” a noise fills his head getting louder, and a light gets brighter._

“DEAN!” he yells out sitting up. His heart races as he wipes away the tears. 

“Cas? Castiel?” His mom is calling for him and Cas knows he should answer, but he can’t stop crying. The dream felt so real...it looked so real. How could he know what Dean looked like? He hadn’t seen him since the dreaded fire that separated them. Anna enters his room, concern clear on her face. “Cas? What’s wrong?” She sits down next to him and suddenly the nickname hurts. Dean had given it to him, and with the current dreams every time he hears the name his heart aches. 

“Castiel,” he says softly wiping away his tears. “I wanna be called Castiel, not Cas,” he mumbles not looking at his mom. That was Dean’s nickname for him. No one else should be able to call him that. Just Dean....well if he ever saw Dean again anyways. He hoped he did, but he had no idea where Dean even was. “I’m going to go play with Gabriel now,” he says, sliding off his bed and going downstairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Garyne for being my beta and keeping me going. I probably would have already abandoned the story if it wasn't for you.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for child abuse. Please don't read if it will trigger you.

Dean’s body aches all over. He doesn’t know how he’s been able to hide the bruises and cuts from Sam so far but thankfully with a little help from some stolen make up, he had been succeeding. He knows he won’t be able to hide it forever, Sam was already getting curious as to why Dean had been limping the other day. He wishes he could fight back, but what good could he do? He was only eight. Azazel was stronger in every way. Right now Dean wanted to sleep away the day. This seems like a very good plan Dean decides, slipping into his bed. He is nearly asleep when he’s torn out of his bed. 

“You nasty freak,” Azazel slurs hitting Dean hard. Dean drops to the floor rolling under the bed. He hopes Azazel will give up, hopes he’s too drunk to care enough to beat Dean. Already he knows his face will probably bruise. A hand wraps around his ankle and pulls hard, he can’t help it, he screams loudly, kicking his feet wildly. He manages to kick Azazel in the face and the man stumbles back. Dean screams again as he stands, his ankle throbbing. “Now you’re going to get it!” Azazel yells grabbing Dean by the neck and throwing him onto the bed. Dean cowers back, trying to make himself as small as possible. “You freak, you fucking nothing,” Azazel says harshly, spitting at Dean. “You’re nothing, Dean. You’ll never be anything. You’re a failure. You’re the reason your mom died. You’re to blame for everything Dean!” Azazel yells, smacking Dean until he falls off the bed. Dean whimpers, knowing that Sam will find out now, he’ll have no way to hide the bruises and the possible sprained ankle. “This is your fault. If you weren’t such a fucking coward I wouldn’t have to beat some damn sense into you,” Azazel growls smacking Dean. “Up. On the bed. Now,” Azazel commands and Dean quickly scampers up onto the bed rolling himself into a ball, cowering on the bed when Sam comes in the room. Azazel stops, staring at the four year old. 

“GET AWAY FROM MY BROTHER!” Sam cries out glaring at Azazel, and then he stomps over to the man and slams his foot hard down on Azazel’s. Sam cries out in pain, his little foot not causing any damage to a boot covered one. Hearing Sam’s cries, Dean sits up, limping over to him. 

“Leave us alone,” Dean mumbles, wrapping his arms tight around his sobbing brother. Azazel stares Dean down for a moment before walking away, deciding the two brats were too much to deal with drunk. Dean lets out a sigh of relief once he’s gone and pulls Sam onto the bed. “Let me see,” he says softly, reaching for Sam’s foot. He pokes at it a bit before declaring it not broken. 

“How do you know?” Sam whimpers, tears streaming down his face. 

Dean smiles softly. “Cause I’m your big brother, and I’m always right,” Dean says, pulling down the covers and tucking Sam into his bed. 

“Okay,” Sam sniffles, wiping at his eyes. “I love you, Dean,” he mumbles sleepily. 

“Love ya too Sammy,” Dean whispers getting into the chair to keep watch. He won’t sleep tonight, in case Azazel comes back. He has to protect Sam. He always has to. 

*  
Azazel despised children, they were too noisy, too sticky and just plain stupid. The only thing Azazel liked about kids was how easily they could be broken. That part he loved. He loved taking a noisy happy child and breaking him down until he was nothing. Azazel grins thinking of his latest attempt of breaking Dean. If only Sam hadn’t come in, Azazel wishes he hadn’t. Now he’ll have to break him the same way and forget about his tests on the boy. Pouring himself a glass of whiskey Azazel sits at his desk dialing a number. 

“Hello?” comes the soft annoying voice. 

“Anna, dear, I found your sweet children you wanted,” Azazel tells her. They’ve been with him for nearly five months but Anna doesn’t need to know this. He wanted to have a little fun first before returning them. “I have a deal for you, however. You have something I need and I have something you need. I suggest a trade. Tell me where John Winchester is, and give me your youngest and I’ll hand over the boys.” He hears her gasp and he grins. Gabriel...the annoying happy child that had climbed all over him. It would be the most fun to break him.

“M-My son? No, I would never!” her voice shakes, and Azazel’s grin widens. “J-John? What do you want with him?” 

“That is mine to know and yours to never find out. So...do we have a deal?” 

“No! I won’t.... No. I would never give you Gabriel,” she yells into the phone hanging up. Azazel chuckles. No bother to him, the two boys would be just as fun to break as Gabriel would be. Azazel gets up, taking a sip of his drink. Now would be a good time to teach the both of them a lesson. 

“Oh boys!” he yells down the hallway heading into Dean’s room. He grins when he sees Dean standing in front of Sam arms crossed. He’s biting his lip to hide the obvious pain from his sprained ankle. “Oh, how cute,” he mocks, finishing his drink and throwing the glass against the wall. Both boys jump causing Azazel to grin wider. 

“Don’t touch my brother,” Dean growls, staring Azazel down. Azazel chuckles. He has no intentions of hurting Sam, at least not tonight. 

“Be a good boy then, Dean,” he says coming over to Dean. The boy hangs his head, ready to accept whatever ‘punishment’ Azazel thought fit for him. Azazel smacks him hard, knocking him to the ground, before Dean can even curl up in a ball to protect himself, Azazel starts kicking until he hears a satisfying snap of one of Dean’s ribs. Azazel pulls out his cell phone putting it on camera. “Smile pretty, boy,” he commands. Dean looks up, grimacing as Azazel snaps the picture. He sends it to Anna as he walks out of the room whistling.


	5. Chapter 5

Castiel wakes up, screaming in pain. His side is throbbing, it hurts to even breathe. The dreams have gotten more frequent, the pain as well, Castiel can no longer pretend they are only dreams. Something strange is happening, something to do with Dean. Anna runs into the room, tears clearly on her face. 

“Castiel? Baby, what’s wrong?” Cas shrugs her off, he can’t tell her. How would be able to explain it? Sorry mom, I had a dream that Dean was being beat up and it beat me up too? Yeah that didn’t sound insane at all. 

“Just a bad dream,” he says with a small whimper. Talking hurts more than breathing. Anna strokes his hair, slowly running her hands through it. It calms Cas down enough for him to fall back asleep.

In the morning Cas wakes up crying. His side feels like it’s on fire. He sits up, whimpering. He can hardly move. He slowly inches off the bed, biting his lip in pain as he stands. Tears sting his eyes, as he rolls up his shirt to look at his side. It’s covered in boot shaped bruises. Cas’ eyes catch on a small silver object almost under his bed. He slowly bends down, grabbing it. It’s his mom’s phone. He frowns, flipping it open. 

“Oh my god,” he mutters. There on his mom’s phone is a picture of Dean. His face is a wreck, and he’s curled into a ball. Why would his mom have this? “Mom?” he calls out marching out of the room. He’s so mad he hardly feels the pain now of his side. “Mom?” he calls out again going into his mom’s room. 

“Castiel? What’s wrong?” she asks concern shining in her eyes.

“What is this?” He asks, shoving the phone in her face. “Why do you have a picture of Dean? Why Mom?” he’s near screaming, and it hurts so much Cas feels like he’s going to pass out but he needs to know why. 

Anna bites at her lip, taking the phone from Cas. “It’s-complicated, Castiel. I asked-a man, a family friend to find the boys for me...”

“Then let’s go! Why are we still here?? Dean needs our help mom!” Cas cries out, before he starts to cry from the pain. 

“Cas?” Anna shouts, pulling Cas to her holding him. 

“Ow, let go,” he mutters, pulling away. Curious, Anna pulls up Castiel’s shirt, gasping at what she finds. 

“Cas, oh god...Why didn’t you tell me the new school was bullying you too?” 

Cas curls his arms around him protectively. He could lie, and say it was from school...or tell the truth and get locked up for being crazy. “It wasn’t at school,” he says softly. “Last night-I dreamt that-I saw Dean get beat up, I saw him and I felt it, and when I woke up-I woke up because of the pain.” Anna stares at Castiel, confused and concerned. “It’s true okay? I’m not-lying to protect someone. But none of that matters now, we have to go save him.” 

“We can’t, Castiel. It’s-The man he’s not a good man-and I don’t even...” Anna sighs looking down. “I don’t know where they are. He won’t tell me, not unless I give him Gabriel.”

Cas stares at his mother hard, not believing what she’s saying. Anna looks away from her son’s piercing gaze. Castiel shakes his head storming away to his room. He’s so angry. At life, at his mom, at the man who hurt Dean. He screams long and hard until he’s out of breath, but it’s not enough and his anger still boils under the skin. He punches the wall, repeatedly not caring about his hand or the wall. He punches and kicks until he’s exhausted, his hand aching and bloody. With one final kick Cas falls to the ground curling into a ball and sobbing himself to sleep. 

*

Dean’s rib is broken. He feels it move with every breath he takes, the pain is unbearable. Now that Sam knows about the constant abuse, Dean knows they can’t remain living this way. It won’t be long before Azazel gets bored of him and starts hurting Sam. Dean would rather die than let that happen. It’s midnight when Dean gets up, throwing together a few measly possessions he actually cares about. 

“Sam, Sammy, get up,” he shakes his brother awake, shushing him when he does wake up. “Come on, we’re getting out of here,” Dean tells him handing him the bag of both their things. They won’t make it far, Dean knows, not with his side. They just have to make it to the hospital and things would be okay. Being in the orphanage again would be better than the abuse he’s put up with. He gets Sam dressed quickly, taking his hand and leading him out of the house. Azazel sleeps on, not hearing them. Dean wants to celebrate the minute their a block away but he doesn’t want to get too cocky. Azazel could still find them. Especially since Dean had no clue where the closest hospital is at. 

They’ve been walking for what feels like forever. Dean’s breath is coming in hard pants as they walk, the pain becoming worse and worse. “Dean? Dean...we need to stop, you can barely walk,” Sam says softly. Dean shakes his head. They can’t stop not yet, not until Sammy is safe. Up ahead Dean sees a house with its lights on. He hopes with his current condition they’ll take them to the hospital and not try to figure out where they live. He doesn’t want to think about what will happen when and if Azazel finds them. 

“Just to that house okay Sammy? We’ll go to that house and ask for help,” Dean promises. He hopes he can make it there himself, hopes that the people inside will be kind. After what feels like an eternity to Dean, they reach the door and Sam knocks long and hard. The door is answered quickly much to Dean’s relief. 

“Oh my,” the young women gasps, opening the door quickly. She takes in Dean’s bruised cover face and how he’s standing and knows something is wrong with the boys in front of her. “Dan,” she calls back grabbing for her coat. “Get the car keys we have some boys here we need to take to the hospital,” she moves quickly and efficiently picking up Sam first and situating him in the car. She comes back for Dean and barely hesitates before picking him up too. He would have protested of course, had his side not hurt so much. The women, Cindy, she introduced as her husband drove, was a nurse that worked at the hospital. Dean felt safer than he had since his mom died and fell asleep on the car ride there. When he wakes up again he’s in a hospital bed, Sam in one next to him. He looks down at his body, feeling better than he had in the entire time they had lived with Azazel. His chest is wrapped tightly and while it makes breathing a little hard it’s not as painful as it had been. Although that probably had something to do with what was pumping into him from the IV. The lady that drove them here comes in, smiling when she seems Dean is awake. “Oh good, you’re awake. How are you doing? Are you in any pain?” she asks, coming over to him.

“No, I feel okay...thank you,” he says softly. “Is Sammy okay?” 

“Your brother’s fine, just exhaustion and a sprained ankle. You on the other hand had loads of injuries...some months old,” she says softly, sitting in the chair next to Dean’s bed. “They had to call the cops when we brought you in...It’s...obvious the two of you went through abuse. I can tell that you protected your brother since he only had the sprained ankle.”

Dean laughs softly. “He only got that cause he stomped on the guy’s foot. Sammy didn’t exactly think that one through,” he says looking over at Sam with a small grin. “What will happen now?” Dean asks. As much as he hates living with Azazel he really doesn’t want to go back to the orphanage.

Cindy smiles softly. “Well...assuming it’s alright with you and your brother..we were thinking of adopting you.” Dean wants to smile and be happy but he knows they didn’t walk that far. He knows Azazel’s house is close....too close for Dean’s comfort. “Oh sweetie, don’t worry, we actually had planned on moving. We put the house up for sale tomorrow,” she says, running a hand through his hair. 

“I-I think that we would really like that,” Dean mumbles trying not to cry. He feels safe again, feels home again. Sammy will be safe. For now his job is done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the lovely wonderful Garyne for being my amazing beta and friend and helping me through the chapters :)


	6. Chapter Six

John Winchester was not a man who was proud of the decisions he had made in his life. He had been nothing more than a con man when he fell in love with Mary. He had wanted nothing more than for the relationship to work...and it had for four years. But even in that time he had lied, cheated and conned his way into things he shouldn’t have. He was too set in his ways, he had wanted to change but it had been too hard. So he left, it was one of the hardest things he had ever done. He loved Mary, truly, but it was better in the end if he was gone. He sometimes wondered how Mary was doing, he didn’t dare look her or the boys up, for fear of wanting to go back and messing up their lives. John shakes his head, he needs to focus at the task at hand, not things from years ago. He needs to focus on his current con. Just as John is about to go back to what he was working on, his phone rings.

“Damn it,” he mutters, pulling out his cell. “John here,” he answers. 

“John-It’s Anna. I know you said not to contact you, but it’s-I need your help-again.” John sighs. “Please John-it’s about-It’s about Sam and Dean.” 

“What?” he asks, sure he heard her wrong. It couldn’t be about his Sam and Dean. “My-my sons?”

“Yes, I-I knew Mary briefly... John, they need your help, they- I don’t- They needed adopting-.obviously given...well, you know... I couldn’t adopt them I had to let them go into the system. I got an old family friend to look into finding them for me but-”

“Wait what? Adopted? What the hell are you talking about Anna? Where’s Mary?”

“John...Mary’s dead... I thought, oh dear, I thought you had known.” John’s world seems to be collapsing around him. He had always hoped Mary had settled down again, found someone good and kind and all the things he never was. 

“When? How? What...” he trails off distraught. How could she be dead? 

“Um I...four years ago, in a house fire. John, the boys the man that adopted them...he’s been abusing them. I don’t...I didn’t know he...” she trails off and John can faintly hear her crying. 

“Anna. Where are my boys?” 

“I don’t know! I didn’t even ask him I just...I’m so stupid...” she says quickly, as her sobbing get louder. For a moment there is only her crying and then a small voice comes through the phone. 

“Hello? Who are you and why are you making my mommy cry?” he hears Anna laugh in the background. 

“Gabe, give mommy back the phone and go play with Castiel.”

“Okay mommy,” John hears Gabe say and then he hears the sound of small feet running away. 

“Anna, this is important, where are my boys?”

“John I don’t know... I have no idea where they are. I’m s-sorry.” Anna says softly and then hangs up the phone. John’s too shocked to even get mad. Mary was dead...his boys lost and beaten. He needed to find them and fast.

*

Dean figures the world is out to get him and Sam, mostly himself than Sam. Sam was pure and kind, Dean was not. At least not in Dean’s eyes. Happiness seemed to be out of reach. At first, living with Dan and Cindy had been wonderful until three months into living with them Cindy died. Dan was too distraught to want the kids and so they went back to the orphanage. Life didn’t get much better after that. Dean dreams for the day he’s eighteen so he can become Sam’s legal guardian. Sadly that was still another six years away. 

Currently Sam and Dean live with a foster parent. Susan is nice, she doesn’t beat any of the kids, but she’s not the best when it comes to actually taking care of the children she fosters. Dean suspects she only does it for the money. At twelve Dean is the oldest of the other four children they live with. Dean can’t help but take the other three under his watch and keep them safe like he keeps Sammy safe. 

“Dean, Adam is hungry and there’s not formula in the house,” Sam says coming up to him holding the six month old baby. Dean sighs, of course there wasn’t. That would require Susan to actually care whether or not they ate. 

“I’ll take care of it, Sammy,” Dean tells him going into their foster parent’s room. Susan thinks she’s smart when it comes to hiding her money but Dean had found it on his first try. He doesn’t feel bad about stealing the cash considering it’s supposed to be used on them anyways. He grabs a couple twenties, knowing they need a lot more than just formula for Adam. It’s times like this Dean wishes he could drive, or that he had a bike. Sadly all he has is a almost broken wagon. “I’ll be back, Sam, take care of them okay?” Sam nods quickly clutching Adam to him. Dean smiles slightly heading out the door and collecting the wagon. It’s a four block walk to the store from their house. After what feels like a lifetime Dean reaches the store, he ties up the wagon with an old bike lock he had found in Susan’s backyard. For twelve years old, Dean is still considered somewhat short, so he can barely see over the cart he pushes. Sometimes Dean wonders why no one questions why a twelve year old is out shopping by himself. 

“Mom, I don’t understand why you constantly buy him candy. He’s going to rot his teeth and he’ll have dentures by the time he’s ten!” A voice comes from down one of the aisles. Dean chuckles to himself. At least he got lucky with Sam always wanting to eat salads and healthy food. Dean glances down the aisle, shock freezing him instantly. It couldn’t be. It had been eight years but still Dean knew he would recognize those blue eyes anywhere.

“I like making you two happy, Castiel. Candy makes Gabe happy, so I buy it. I don’t give it to him all at once anyways. Always in moderation,” Anna tells Cas with a roll of her eyes. Dean stands there, staring unable to move. He should leave, or say something. Anything...but what if Cas didn’t even remember him. It was eight years ago...they had only been four years old. Just as Dean is about to leave Cas looks up and over his eyes locking on Dean. 

Castiel stares for nearly a full minute before he finally walks up to Dean. “Dean,” he says softly and Dean is lost. How is it possible that the boy he’s been dreaming about and wishing he could see again for the last eight years possibly be standing here in front of him?

“Cas...” Dean responds, still too shocked to form anything more than a few words. Before he can stop himself Dean is reaching for Cas’ hand and grabbing it. It’s like an electric shock goes through him the moment their hands meet. Anna has finally noticed that Cas is not standing next to her and makes her way over to the pair. 

“Cas who is your....?” she trails off once she looks at Dean. “Oh my god. Dean.” Dean only nods. He wonders how both of them recognize him right away considering he had been four the last time they saw each other. As much as Dean would love to stay and talk he has a hungry six month waiting for food. And soon he’ll also have an eight, seven and six year old hungry as well. 

“Well....I um I best be getting on with the shopping,” Dean mumbles as if it’s totally normal for a twelve year old to be responsible for whether or not his family eats. Anna frowns at Dean slightly, turning away. Cas tilts his head in a way that Dean can’t help but think is adorable. 

“Where are you staying? Shouldn’t they do the shopping? Why are you so thin Dean?” Cas asks each question right after the other. Dean looks down, blushing. 

“Just a house, is all. Foster mom ain’t got the time to go so I do it. And I’m not thin, I’m perfectly fine,” Dean says with a glare, crossing his arms over his chest defensively. Truth is Dean knew he had lost some weight recently, but it was hard to keep himself fed when he had the others to look after and only so much money. “I gotta go,” he mutters, pushing the cart away from the family. He tries not to think about Cas’ disappointed face as he left. 

He thinks it’s only been at least two hours since he had been gone. He hopes Sam hasn’t worried too much, a normal trip only takes him about an hour and a half. All Dean wants to do when he gets back is collapse on his semi-comfortable bed and sleep for the rest of the night. It’s clear from the commotion coming from inside the house as he gets back that it will be a long night before he sleeps. 

“You! You stole my money you little brat!” Susan shouts pointing at Dean the moment he walks in the door. Dean shrugs, and begins to put away the groceries. This isn’t the first time Susan has discovered Dean had taken the money so he’s not too worried with the current yelling. “Listen to me when I’m talking boy! I’m sick of you not listening, do whatever ya please and disrespecting me,” she rants as Dean prepares the bottle for Adam. Once it’s done he hands it off to Sam so the baby isn’t around all the yelling. 

“Are you done?” Dean asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“Am I done? Yeah, I’m done with you. Come on, you’re going back to the damn orphanage. You ain’t worth the money I get,” Susan complains, gripping tightly onto Dean’s wrist. 

“Wait, no, please. I can’t, don’t make me leave Sam here,” Dean begs. It’s his job to take care of Sam, his only job, he can’t fail this one. 

“Well you shoulda thought of that before you stole from me now shouldn’t ya?” She says with a smile, dragging him into the car. Dean stares out the window at Sam as Susan drives away. This was not what he wanted to happen. 

*  
Cas can’t get Dean out of his head. Ever since the random meeting at the grocery store it’s all Cas can think about. Had he always been so close all this time? Had Dean really been so close that Cas could have gone and saved him? Cas tried not to be so disappointed when Dean abruptly leaves and Cas doesn’t see him until the end of the trip when he sees Dean pulling a red wagon filled with groceries. It bugs Cas to no end. He needs to find Dean. Castiel sets out on a mission. The wagon had clearly been broken so Cas hopes it won’t be too hard to find it again. Surely Dean couldn’t live that far from the store. 

Cas goes walking every day after school, he spots lots of red wagons but none are Dean’s. He’s about to lose hope when he sees it. There the red broken wagon sitting on the unkempt lawn of a small two bedroom house. There is no car in the driveway but Cas can’t help but hope Dean will be there anyways. He runs to the door knocking quickly. He hears faint voices and tiny sounds of feet walking before the door opens. 

“Sam,” Cas blurts out, unsure how he manages to recognize the boy considering he had just been a baby when they saw each other. “Sam, where’s Dean? Where’s your brother?” 

Sam stares in confusion at Cas. “I’m sorry...but who are you?” 

“Castiel, I...your brother and I were friends when he was four. Before your...” he trails off changing his mind about bringing up their mothers death. "Where is Dean?"

Sam frowns looking down. "She took him back to the orphanage." Cas nods. He'll find him there then rescue him if he can....somehow.

“Thank you Sam,” he says softly, turning away from the house. He doesn’t know exactly what to do now expect go to the orphanage. He leaves the house feeling guilty about not trying to help Sam. He’s not even sure what he could do to help, for Dean or Sam all he knows is that he has to see Dean again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the beautiful and lovely Garyne for being my beta


End file.
